Barnacle Boy and Crash Kid had guests to dinner the other night. The Boy was using his napkin to flick his buddy. "Stop flicking Game Guy!" "I'm not flicking him, the napkin is!" "The napkin has no self-determination, you decide for the napkin." I shot back. Crash enters the fray, "Self-determination is a key human right." Now the conversation has moved to what it means to be human (and how this does not apply to napkins). From my perspective this is a win: Barnacle Boy is no longer flicking the napkin at Game Guy. We are however, making Grown Girl, our other guest, nervous. She put the brakes on with, "Whoa, long word alert. Too many long words are making me nervous!"
Barnacle Boy tells her solemnly that she must suffer from hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, a long word for the fear of long words. It rolls off his tongue, but none of the rest of us can manage it, particularly not when laughing so hard! We decided that while Grown Girl is certainly a hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobic, the Boy is on track to be a hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophile I don't know if Grown Girl will ever come back to eat with us again, even if we are having tacos.
According to Wikipedia, Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is not a real phobia. The word doesn't appear in the Oxford English dictionary, nor in the DSM. Nonetheless, this site offers hope for sufferers.