Sunday, November 08, 2026

Tumbling into fiction

 

The main altar at Notre Dame, gold cross in center, charirs with people in foreground, stained glass windows at top
I wondered how the glass ring that enclosed the Crown Of Thorns was attached to the red velvet pillow. (See photo here.)  Tied? Sewn? Surely not velcroed!

After my unfortunate accident on the altar in August, I can now envision a moment where the person with the Crown trips over their alb...the velvet pillow goes flying, the glass ring tumbles in mid-air. (Cue slow motion shot.) Knights dive to catch it, but to no avail. It hits the ground with an explosive crash.

The contents of the reliquary skitter across the floor. The cathedral is momentarily silent, everyone is frozen in place. Then the scramble starts. People grab for the bits of vine on the floor. Knights reach for swords that aren't there. The doors to the Cathedral swing closed and security guards come from every corner.

I tuck a bit of broken glass in my pocket. Once this would have been a 3rd class relic.

Thursday, November 05, 2026

Indulging in Paris and the Crown of Thorns

steeple and roof of a church against a blue sky with a puff of cloud to the right; a crane is visible on the left, behind the roof
Today is the feast of All Saints of the Order for the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits). The 13th of November is the corresponding feast for the Augustinians. And tomorrow is a "first Friday." In Roman Catholic practice the first Friday in a month is often reserved for a particular purpose. There might be a special liturgy or blessing, or there might be an indulgence available for those who go to Mass.

Last month, on the first Friday of October, Math Man and I were in Paris. At Notre Dame. The renovated cathedral is beautiful, though I have no point of comparison as this was my first trip to Paris. 

Notre Dame houses a  Crown of Thorns.  (I hesitate to say "the" — there is a list of about 700 thorns "from" the crown of thorns in existence. Some are 3rd class relics — touched to a first class relic— some are undoubtedly just objects of devotion. Reminders of The Crown, but disjoint.) Crowns of Thorns has been venerated since the 5th century. The provenance of this particular relic doesn't stretch quite so far. What seems relatively certain is that it resided in Constantinople, then was used as collateral for a loan and held by a Venetian bank. Louis XI redeemed it in the 13th century, removed it to Paris where he built Sainte-Chapelle to house it. 

On the first Friday of the month, the Crown of Thorns that is held at Notre Dame is taken out and brought in procession to the main altar for anyone who wishes to venerate it. It was the first Friday in October, so  we found seats in the nave (kept for those who want to pray or attend a liturgy) and waited. Victor read about the design and construction of the church, I meditated. People drifted in, including a tour group that took up the rest of our row and the two rows behind us. Two dames of the Sepulchre were working their way down the aisle, selling holy cards with a photo of the relic on the front. Two euros each. The leader of the tour group asks for 22 of them, which the dame duly counts out for her. When asked for the 44  euros, however, she balks. Negotiations ensue, the leader buys two, the dame sniffs and moves off. "Madame. Madame!" I try to attract her attention. She finally turns back and when I ask for a holy card she lets out an exasperated sigh. Ah, no, I am not with the group that waffled. I hand over my two Euros and get a card (this is the only thing I use cash to purchase in the entire trip.)

The liturgy began with a procession of red vested clergy, accompanied by Knights (and Dames) of the Holy Sepulchre. Knights in white capes with red crosses on their shoulders and dames draped in black lace mantillas followed. The relic, in its glass reliquary, was nestled on a red pillow. The organ sounded deep mournful chords to accompany the procession. There were Gospel readings (in French and I could not catch enough to identify the pericopes). We sang hymns. And like at least a thousand years of believers before me, I approached the altar. I watched the small family — mother, father and two year-old  — kiss the glass, and cross themselves. "Thank you," I hear the mother whisper. I laid my hand on the glass and offered up a brief prayer for two friends in particular who are having a very tough time. 

Does it matter whether or not the crown of thorns is "real", whether it ever touched the head of Jesus of Nazareth? The Church does not demand that I believe, and I'm not sure I demand belief of myself. It is perhaps enough that we come together and reverently encounter each other. That we might for at least a amoment, hold each other close in thought and prayer. To hope for each other.


An indulgence in Paris might be tarte tatin eaten sitting on the terrace of a café across the Seine, but indulgences in Catholic parlance are practices that reduce time in purgatory, the time to work off the effects of sin. Yes, I know, is there time in the heaven as we know it here? We used to say partial indulgences get you so many days or years off. Make the sign of the cross and your time of purgation is reduced by 100 days, use holy water and its 300 days. Plenary indulgences are a hard reset, returning the counter to zero. Spending three days on retreat or thirty minutes of meditation on the scriptures or in front of the Eucharist gain a plenary indulgence. As far as I know, there is not an indulgence for venerating the relic of the Crown of Thorns.

For much of my adult life, three solid days on retreat felt like an indulgence of the tarte tatin sort, so I'm not sure that the current theology of indulgences would say that it would "count" for me, but time to stop scurrying down this rabbit hole and return you to your regularly scheduled programming (and me to my actual writing), which hopefully includes some time for God and whatever treat takes the place of tarte tatin in your life.


Monday, November 02, 2026

The Communion of Saints

If you want a glimpse of the communion of saints, stand outside Arrivals Door 4 at Minneapolis-St. Paul airport and watch people's faces as their rides swoop in to pick them up. They instantly light up when they catch sight of their friends and family. You can just bask in the joy.


I flew to MSP last week to give a talk at Carleton College. The arrivals pick up zone is very much a NO WAITING zone. Get your passenger(s) and move. So very limited hugging.

Friday, October 30, 2026

Fright or flight?

I checked my work email yesterday to find a reminder to check in for my flight "tomorrow from MSP to PHL". What??!? I thought I was flying PHL to MSP later that afternoon and returning not tomorrow — tomorrow I was giving a talk at Carleton — but the day after. How had I screwed up? 

I hastily checked my tickets on my phone. Whew, they were correct. So where did that email come from? It was a reminder from Outlook which had (helpfully?) automatically put the flights on my calendar when the email from Delta arrived, except it scrambled the day. An artificial fright from an artificial agent. Happy Halloween!


Tuesday, October 27, 2026

Les toilettes

Bathrooms are the often unspoken challenge of travel.  Not only where they are, but what they might be called, how they might be marked, and how to navigate them. I still remember being utterly baffled at the 27 different controls in a edgy bathroom in a very upscale restaurant in Tokyo. (How edgy? There was a one way mirror out into the restaurant.) All the controls were labeled — in Japanese. I could recognize only one of the kanji. I made my best guess. 

At the Rodin museum in Paris (an 18th century residence where Rodin lived and worked) I followed the standard icons to the ladies room. Except the last arrow seemed to lead to a blank wall. I backtracked. No, I hadn't missed a turn. Math Man finally inquired of the guard who pointed at a button on another wall and said, "Push!" We did and a whole section of the adjacent wall slid back to reveal a modern corridor with bathrooms and an elevator and a water fountain and many people bustling about. I would never have guessed that was a door, to say nothing of all the activity it concealed. 

We visited Montmartre on a gloriously sunny day. The view over Paris was astounding. Before we walked down, we sought the facilities. The map showed a public bathroom just below Sacre-Couer. There was perforce a line, unisex for once. There was also a 2 euro fee, which you could pay with a wave of your phone. A small price to pay for a clean, stocked and staffed bathroom with individual stalls and behind a wall (a literal paywall?) a bank of urinals. I waited, waved, and went. Math Man was right behind me in line. Afterward he noted that the urinals were not so private. "Well, you didn't have to use them." But he did.

On our last full day in Paris, we visited an amazing cooking supply store (E. Dehillerin!). A mother with kids asked an employee about bathrooms. "Outside. Let me show you." She looked dubious, but her son looked desperate and out they trooped, vanishing into the little tree covered median across the street. It's not what you are thinking! We finished our shopping and headed out, also in search of facilities. Across the street, on the opposite corner, was a large grey pod. Les toilettes. Les high-tech toilettes! The light was red indicating it was occupied, but Math Man found what he was looking for on the other side, stepping behind a screen with a discreet but descriptive icon. There was a station outside to wash your hands and another to fill your water bottle up.

The pod slid open and someone exited, the door quickly shut to enable the wash cycle. Yep, these are self-cleaning bathrooms that clean after every user. Don't be too quick to enter, or you may find yourself taking an unwelcome shower. The light turned green and though a bit damp, the pod sparkled. There was a sink inside as well. And all for free.

In summary, I would give Paris a five flush rating. 


Read about the self-cleaning pods. A commenter points out a move to increase bathroom access in NYC where according to the article there are "1,064 public bathrooms, mainly in parks and libraries, though only 973 of them are operational — or roughly one for every 9,035 New Yorkers." Paris has more than 450 of the free street bathrooms alone.

I used no cash in France, at all. Even donations for the candles in the churches could be made with a card or phone. In fact, I used no cash at all this trip. Not in Norway, the UK, or France.