Wednesday, May 09, 2007

To coin a phrase

I've coined a new word: aparent v. to temporarily detach from parental duties, to vanish from the house to take a walk, to be unavailable to referee. The other evening I sought to aparent while my two guys watched TV before bed. Math Man was on his way home from an evening event, and I wanted to get in my 30 minutes of walking before it got too late. "OK for me to take a walk?" I queried the bodies sprawled on the living room floor. I took the grunts as assent and grabbed my iPod to circle the block (four circles is 2 miles, clearly I'm not in this for the scenery). First circle, no Math Man but house is still standing. I'm relieved. Second circle, still no van in the driveway, no flames. Still relieved, but guilt is tapping at my door. Third time is the charm, Math Man's home and I can truly be aparental. Whew! The final lap winds to a close and as I open the door I hear Crash sobbing. I hadn't bargained on a commericial break wrestling match gone bad. "Can't you guys manage for 20 minutes on your own?" wonders Mom. Barnacle Boy looked me right in the eye and said "Apparently, not!" Aparent - not.

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